lots of things to do. dedline ku bertumpuk tumpuk. berlapis lapis. berlipat lipat. tabrak sana tabrak sini. sampe2 aku bener2 ninggalin amanah. duh, parah banget!!!! newsletter amsa unsri belom kubuat samasekali. SAMASEKALI. bener2 ga tau apa yg harus ditulis. bener2 lupa sama apa yg telah terjadi.
gw bingung. gw terlalu perfeksionis. parah. jadinya gw ngaret ret ret ret. n gw bener2 ga ada muka buat ketemu sm INEZ dan NURUL. ya Allah...
malam ini, chat sm Ilman. i feel the difference. not good. coz, the "interest" come over me. the chat was not good. i control the conversation. he just say "yes", "no", "waw!", "really?" and i talk a bunch. on the begining i thought it was because he wants to talk to me, but lately i know the he was. maybe i'm not the only girl he wants to talk with. there so much girl in his environment, in his chat room, and i'm just one of them that's it.
i consider it lately. so stupid! that's i am. i'm to stupid to think that all the people is as not professional as i am. that he like me. in fact, he just wants to be friend with me. how stupid i am.
ilman is not the first man that makes me confused. there was eki before, who did even worse thet he did. and eki didn't like me. ohh.. how stupid!
"i hate your respectness and politeness. it hurts me."
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